I have spent much time evaluating the condition of things in my life and the direction in which I am moving, and I believe some important decisions must be made if I am to feel comfortable with my own future.  My contemplations have not been in vain, nor have they been shallow indications of a lack of certainty.  Instead, I have concluded that now is to be a significant turning point in my life.  Please, bear with me as I try to explain.

So that I might focus all of my creative efforts on future writing projects, including novels, articles and short stories, I have decided to give up blogging.  I realize having just passed my three-year blog anniversary that too much of my energy is being spent on this digital journal.  If I am to succeed in what I hope to be a gainful career in authorship, I must give up this particular avenue of expression and target its effort toward that end.  Today, therefore, marks the end of my online writing activities.  I will miss all of you, rest assured, but I hope you understand my reasons for deciding to move on to other things.  I do not know if or how long I will leave this site up.  I do know that there will be no more posting here.

A healthy dose of obsessive soul-searching has guided me to the irrefutable conclusion that my life is not on track.  I believe somewhere along the way I stepped off of the road upon which I should travel and have since become lost in a menagerie of secularism and godlessness.  Many years ago I spent tremendous time and effort evaluating religion, a quest which ultimately led me to conclude no spiritual path was necessary for me.  That decision over the many years since has filled my pockets while simultaneously emptying my soul.  I was up most of last night reading the Bible and concluded I was indeed lost.  I am now going to refocus myself on God and a sincere desire to serve him in every aspect of my life.  Tomorrow, for the first time in more than 15 years, I will return to church as a regular part of my spiritual life.

In the nearly 36 years that I have been alive, a great deal of my intellect has been involved with and focused on a search for knowledge through science.  Only now do I realize that pursuit has been for naught.  Science has nothing to offer me.  I believe it robs my soul of faith and incorrectly consumes my attention that ultimately should be used in pursuit of an eternity in Heaven, the preaching of the Gospel, the saving of souls, and the living of a righteous and honorable life patterned on the Word of God.  There no longer remains any use for the heathenish practice of godless science that wants only to condemn me to hell by calling into question all that my faith says is true.  Therefore, I am forever turning my back on this atheistic cult and will instead accept biblical explanations for all that was, is and will be.  There is no need for any other explanation so long as God’s word provides the answers.  What in the natural world that cannot be reconciled with His Word is irrelevant.

While I very much love my cats, in light of this profound change in my life I now understand they are nothing more than animals placed on this planet by God to serve humans, and treating them as my children and loving them in such a way is the worst offense possible by way of anthropomorphism that insults the very image after which we were created.  We humans are superior in every way, we rule the planet at our will and whim, and animals serve no purpose in that scheme outside of whatever help they can lend to fulfilling our needs and desires.  I have wasted far too much time, money and emotion on creatures that deserve none of it, and I am ashamed.  The cats are to be set free in the wild of the lake park by which I live.  If it is God’s will, they will survive, but otherwise they will fall prey to the natural world just as Our Lord intended.

My skepticism for too long has betrayed me.  I must accept by faith that which cannot be simply explained by mere observation.  I will allow my faith to tender reason for that which I would normally question.

I have lived far too long in this sinful life of homosexuality.  It is abhorrent to God and contrary to His will.  I was tempted away from Christ and into this filthy lifestyle by sin and its deceptive rewards.  I am now heterosexual by the grace of Jesus Himself, brought back to His flock by His strength alone.  How I could ever have decided being gay was acceptable is beyond me, and I beg His forgiveness for making that decision so long ago.  Because it was a choice and not inherent in my being from birth, I accept responsibility for the abomination I was and happily receive God’s forgiveness and guidance as I return to the lifestyle I turned my back on.

My political views must now be aligned with those as set forth by God’s Word.  I will no longer question those in power as I accept they were put there by God.  Their decisions are just, their guidance infallible, and their leadership unquestionable.

In a blatant display of haughty arrogance, I drive a Lexus which screams of excess and condescends to those not blessed with the financial success I have enjoyed.  It is time for me to return to a simpler lifestyle and to share whatever money I have with those who are less fortunate, and this does not include the animal shelters and conservation efforts to which I have already given so much.  I will sell my car and use that money to bless the church and its efforts to save souls.  I will retain only enough to purchase something that will demonstrate my sacrifice and adherence to God’s Word.

I am removing all of my piercings and will undertake whatever efforts are necessary to have my tattoos removed.  They are an affront to God.  My body is His temple and I have defiled it in horrible ways.  It must be returned to normalcy and made holy for Him.

Following in the footsteps of Anne Rice, my writing will now focus on glorifying God and leading others to the eternal bliss that only comes from Him.  I will teach, guide, convert, and focus all of my energy on saving souls.  With His help and direction, my works will speak to His benevolence and spending eternity with him by way of a holy, God-fearing life.

I realize much of this is shocking, but understand I have made these decisions (as well as many others not included here) as part of a reckoning within my own being.  I have lived in sin for too long, and I have likewise forsaken Jesus and His teachings.  May He forgive me.