I’ve had it. These people couldn’t find their way our of a wet paper sack if you gave them a map, a knife, and a swift kick in the ass.
Since January of this year, I have had nothing but problem after problem with them. It all focuses on their online billing system. They performed an upgrade on it at the first of the year. That upgrade has now caused me eleven—ELEVEN!—months of anguish and frustration and growing anger. Why? Because it either sends me my “bill ready notification” late in the evening on the date the payment is due or—and this has been more common—it doesn’t send me any notice at all. I have fought with them, struggled against the tide of corporate ineptitude, used humor to mask my own anger, explained eleven times in a row why I’m calling about the same problem now almost a year old, and shouted against a brick wall when it came to having late fees removed that were added because they didn’t send me a bill or didn’t send one until it was too late to pay it on time.
But let’s not take my word for it. Let’s delve into history.
I called them in February about the January bill. Thinking it to be a minor glitch, I did not track any of the information. I paid the bill. They promised solutions. End of story.
March 2, 2006: I contacted Cingular after one month of billing problems and explained to them that I had not received a bill for February. That is case number KMM4494602V26406L0KM.
March 4, 2006: A self-proclaimed “Customer Care Professional” contacted me and said the following (case number KMM4511022V9622L0KM):
This condition occurred after a recent upgrade to our online account manager. However, our web engineers have informed us that this issue has been resolved, and that you will receive a bill ready notification after the close of the current cycle on 03/05/2006.
March 23, 2006: I contacted Cingular yet again to let them know I still had not received the billing as promised. I also explained that late fees on my bill should be removed since the payment was late due to their inability to send me a “bill ready notification” on time and with enough warning for me to pay it before it was due. This is marked as case number KMM4660538V25907L0KM. That note said the following:
If this was an error on your system, why was I charged a late payment fee? In addition, my payment of 131.83 cleared the bank on 3/8/2006, yet my bill still shows it as past due.
This is a problem your system created — obviously the result of terrible planning and a bad upgrade implementation. It is your responsibility to fix it, to reverse any late payment charge on my bill, and ensure my last payment is properly credited to my account.
March 23, 2006: A clueless git contacts me under case number KMM4665059V48915L0KM and tells me the following:
A late fee of 1.5% is assessed when a payment does not post by the due date. Service may also be interrupted.
Our records indicate that your payment was due on 02/25/06 no later than 03/05/06. Because your payment posted to your account on 03/08/06, this fee will remain on the account. Your balance is currently…
If a contractual agreement exists where you are not to be charged late fees, please fax a copy of it to 866-378-3031 and make attention [redacted] and your account will be credited… No changes will be made on your account until Cingular Wireless has received this information.
Yes, that’s right. She ignored my message and the copy of their original apology/explanation. Instead of reading the facts, including THEIR WRITTEN PROMISE that the issue was resolved, she basically spit on me and said I had to pay the late fees unless I had something in writing that said otherwise (apparently the written statement already submitted was not the kind of “in writing” she was looking for; bitch…).
March 23, 2006: I sent back another copy of their statement showing that it was their fault, that I was not responsible for the late fees, and that they claimed the issue had been resolved. That was case number KMM4665846V52981L0KM. That note included a copy of the original response from them—again—as well as more blustering from me about it being their responsibility to fix the issue and credit the late fees.
March 23, 2006: I sent yet another response with their original message, and I demanded immediate action to resolve what was clearly an illegal act on their part. That was case KMM4665059V48915L0KM.
March 24, 2006: They respond in case number KMM4675978V44712L0KM with the following:
Your bill cycle closes on the 5th of each month. Normally your invoice will generate 5-10 days after the close of your bill cycle. From time to time, the printing or delivery of your bill may be delayed due to call record processing, or vendor issues or postal delivery. At this time, your bill has not yet generated. When the bill is prepared for viewing or mailing, you should receive an email notification. I do apologize for the delay, and thank you for your patience. I also show you have been credited a courtesy late fee and your balance…
I do not have to point out how ludicrous it is to tell me about billing issues related to vendors, printing, the USPS, and so on. We’re talking about electronic notification and delivery. This is yet another clueless idiot not reading or paying attention.
April 20, 2006: Same song, same dance, different day. I contacted them to let them know I once again had not received a “bill ready notification” and that my bill was nearly past due and could not be paid before it was late. That was case number KMM4889767V63969L0KM.
April 21, 2006: They contacted me to offer the same empty promises and apologies in case number KMM4889862V64396L0KM:
We were notified by our IT department that the issue had been resolved. Again, I do apologize for the inconvenience. We will submit another ticket to our IT department to correct this problem. You have no late fees on your most current bill. Your balance is… due until 5/5/06 to avoid late fees.
May 12, 2006: I contacted them again and opened case number KMM5068380V62598L0KM to let them know I had not received the latest bill and desperately wanted the problem resolved.
May 15, 2006: First, I finally get the “bill ready notification” showing me my bill was due about a week later. I also got a response under case number KMM5075170V60610L0KM that offered the same meaningless platitudes I had been seeing for five months.
I have filed an IT tech. case for your issue. The case number for this is Case number HD0000017287992. This is not the same as a case. I went directly to the computer guys to see if we can resolve this issue for you. I am sorry this is taking so long.
June 13, 2006: For the first time in six months, I got a “bill ready notification” that was sent and arrived two weeks before the bill was due. I subsequently wet my pants and run around the lake naked in unadulterated glee.
July 25, 2006: I received my “bill ready notification” on the day my bill is due. Yawn.
July 26, 2006: I received another “bill ready notification” telling me my bill was ready and was due the day before. Um, whatever.
July 31, 2006: I contacted Cingular yet again (case number KMM5723851V80163L0KM) to let them know how tedious this had become and how FUCKING PISSED OFF it was making me. Well, I was a bit more polite:
I received my “bill ready notification” on 7/25/2006 telling me I could now view my latest bill. I viewed the bill, and it says my payment was due 7/25/2006. That’s the same day you sent me the notice. I’ve had nothing but trouble with this online system since your upgrade earlier in the year. I’m sick of it.
It could have been worse, I assure you.
August 1, 2006: They responded (case number KMM5733478V59012L0KM):
Our records show that you will not be assessed a late fee until after August 5th.
No attempt to resolve the problem. No looking into the enormous mess. No nothing. Just a simple, patronizing message shoving me aside with a gentle reminder that I shouldn’t be late paying the bill. Fuckers.
August 15, 2006: I received a “bill ready notification” that gave me 10 days to pay the bill. I paid it on time and ignorantly spent little time considering the shortened payment period (they must provide at least two weeks, or 15 days, from notification or expected delivery to the due date).
September 10, 2006: I received a “bill ready notification” that gave me the required 15 days. I’m ecstatic and consider the problem resolved. Finally.
October 25, 2006: I received a “bill ready notification” at 7:56 p.m. on the date it was due. I was not happy, and I was not about to deal with more bullshit.
November 1, 2006: After already paying the bill electronically, I called them and had them open an urgent case (number CM20061101_482202). I explained they needed to mark my account so I wasn’t charged late fees, and they NEEDED TO FIX THE FUCKING PROBLEM. I received additional promises and guarantees.
By that time, supervisors and managers and all sorts of people had been involved. Was it fixed?
November 28, 2006: I checked my online bill and found it was due November 25, 2006. I never received a notice. Surprised? I wasn’t. Eleven months wasted on chasing down this stupid problem with a company disinterested in customer service or taking responsibility, and there I sat late on my cell phone bill with nothing but more empty promises. Sure, I called them. Some idiot told me being angry wasn’t going to help. That little bastard can go screw himself on a flagpole for all I care. I’ve spent almost THE WHOLE GODDAMNED YEAR being polite, using humor to mask my anger and frustration, and all I’d gotten in return were empty promises, more headaches, late fees that were hard as hell to get removed even I could prove unquestionably that Cingular caused them, patronizing assholes pretending like they appreciated or understood my position and why I was upset, and nothing but more problems.
When I got some supervisor on the phone, he was unable to catch his boss to get him on the phone. Mind you, I’d received ample promises from supervisors and managers over the past eleven months, and it has all been fruitless—empty promises to placate a customer who was getting the shaft time and again, and I got more of the same when I last called. Sure, we’ll chase it down. Yes, I’m escalating right now. You bet we’ll get this fixed. Uh-huh, I’ll have my boss call you in the morning.
Jesus Fucking Christ On A Crutch With A Goddamn Headache To Boot!
Do you think his boss called? No, he didn’t. That’s the kind of disservice Cingular is dishing out. It’s highly offensive for a manager to ignore a customer complaint and escalation—ESPECIALLY ON A PROBLEM THAT’S BEEN GOING ON ALMOST ALL YEAR LONG. In fact, it’s more than offensive. The guy I did talk to called repeatedly to let me know they were working on it. That was more than I’d gotten for the previous eleven months.
December 12, 2006: I got a “bill ready notification” that falls short of the two week notice but was still early enough for me to pay it on time. I also got a call from the gentleman handling the ordeal, and his message indicated they “think” they fixed the problem. Actually, he sounded more certain than that, but I’ve heard the same crap since this year began, and now it’s almost over and I’m hearing the same thing. I don’t believe and won’t believe it until three or four months have gone by without problems.
And did I ever hear from his boss? Nope.
So when I call him back, I’m escalating above his boss. You see, if a manager ignores an escalation and considers the customer expendable so far as service is concerned, especially in a case where Cingular is WHOLLY AND COMPLETELY TO BLAME for the problems being experienced month after month after month, and they’ve even put it in writing on MANY OCCASIONS that they are to blame, then I have no interest in dealing with that manager. Instead, I want to deal with HIS MANAGER. Shit rolls downhill, you fucker, and I intend to pursue this until heads are lobbed off and people get their asses in major trouble. At this point, I don’t care if the problem is fixed or not; I WILL NOT BE IGNORED BY A MANAGER OF CUSTOMER SERVICE. Period.
And let me say this: If I don’t get a call from a higher being within the organization, and I mean above the manager who ignored me and didn’t call LIKE HE PROMISED HE WOULD, I’m naming names right here on the intertubes. I’m going to post full details of every communqué with names and phone numbers and e-mail addresses. I’m going to bash the people right along with the company. And why? Because it’s my right to do so. If Cingular and its inept employees think they can step all over the people who pay their bills, they have another thing coming.
Oh, and the statute of limitations for filing a lawsuit on all this criminal activity isn’t until February (for the first occurrence). Imagine a class action lawsuit on this. Multiple crimes each month, and how many customers have been impacted? How many have paid the late fees thinking they were to blame for not paying the bill on time? How many, Cingular? How many do you think?