Making it matter

I’m on call this week.  Yes, that’s quite soon following my last stint in this hellish place, my last encounter with this unrelenting burden.  Believe me, no one appreciates that curse more than I.

Keep that in mind should posting seem a bit thin.

But also consider something else.

I’ve said time and again that I need to cut back on blogging so I can focus on more important things, such as The Kids, family and friends, my novels, my quest to relocate, enjoying nature, and photography, not to mention a hundred other things.

Well, the time has come.

Throughout this week I shall endeavor to thin the heard of blogs I read.  That by no means casts a negative light on those who fall by the wayside, but it does mean they simply didn’t stand the test of community and consequence which must now be applied to my commitments.  In truth, those I let go of simply don’t weigh as much as those I keep.

And doing so will lighten my load significantly.

The next several days will also provide ample time for me to evaluate and solidify a rigid approach to my own blog.  Because I must have time to complete Dreamdarkers so I can move on to End of the Warm Season, Centralia, The Breaking of Worlds, and the growing remainder of my novelist endeavors, and because I dare not give up my offline journaling given its lifelong cathartic liberation, blogging must suffer a digital RIF if I have any hope of succeeding in my search for writing success.

None of that compares to the newfound burden I carry with integrating Larenti with the rest of The Kids.  Each of them will require more of my time and affection to make the growing pain less severe.  Each of them deserves my unmitigated love and attention if I am to provide them all they deserve, a life full of compassion and safety, a peaceful home, the devotion of a father who wishes to provide them with an existence that is rich, full, rare.  If we believe ourselves worthy of such things, why then should I not consider them worthy?  For they are.

I can’t tell you now what the future will hold.  While I do have a firm grip on many of the changes I intend to make, I don’t want to blather ad nauseam about them until I can offer a sound, definitive plan.  Expect that in short order.

Ultimately, however, the goal is simple: Make it matter.

Make life matter.

Make goals matter.

Make blogging matter.

Make it all matter.

Stay tuned for updates.  I promise no extreme changes that will alienate anyone who reads my mental discharge on a regular basis.  I do promise to lighten the load, both yours and mine, and to focus on what I see as the most important pieces of this experiment.

[you can thank Theriomorph for helping me feel the power necessary to finally do what needed to be done; I strongly suggest you read that post from her; it’s a “Dear John” letter, yes, and one I should have written long ago; kudos to her for having the strength to face withdrawal so publicly and valiantly; I only hope I can follow her lead]

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